THOSE POWERFUL PEOPLE
Understanding people is essential in building healthy marriages. Many of the problems in marriage are because we married someone who is our opposite. No wonder we can’t figure them out!
If you are married to a choleric person, you’ve married a winner. Cholerics are confident, sure-of-themselves people who aren’t afraid of a challenge. They know where they’re going and will find a way over, under, around or through any obstacle. They are Get-Er-Done people. And they don’t take no for an answer. If you want something done quick and correctly, get a choleric to help you do it. They have a powerful and sometimes domineering personality that makes them really valuable players. They are natural leaders and you can see it early on in childhood. Its the way they are wired to take charge. They tend to be extroverted and more focused on the task at hand than the relationship with others.
And that reveals the down-side of a choleric: they sometimes roll right over others to get the job done. Not cool. In a marriage, which has to function as a partnership, these cholerics, whether they are the wife or the husband, have a very hard time listening to the other side of an issue. They know their way is better, so they bowl others over and hurt feelings result. Cholerics need to back off a bit and listen as well as be heard. And if you’re married to one, ratcheting things up a bit only brings out the worst in the choleric, who will fight to win. How do you deal with your choleric?: “A soft answer turns away wrath” (Proverbs 15:1).
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